Gary Chapman’s book, The Five Love Languages, is no mere best-seller. It’s a phenomenon. Its concepts have crossed over into just about every walk of life. Most people could tell you all five love languages and which one or two are theirs. It has been translated into something like a bajillionty languages and in every continent except Antarctica. So from Iceland to Maylasia people know their love languages.
But you know what? Gary Chapman forgot a few love languages. He may be a smart man, but he clearly doesn’t really know what love is.
1) Sarcasm/Mockery
All the fellas know what this is about. We know our true friends because they mercilessly mock us. And through it we feel appreciated. Dr. Chapman wrote about “words of encouragement”, but that’s something altogether different. Sarcasm and mockery is more like a baseline of friendship. If you can’t freely make fun of me and I you, how can we be friends? How can we trust each other? Counter-intuitive? Maybe. But true nonetheless.
2) Food
They don’t call it “comfort food” for nothing.
“The quickest way to man’s heart is through his stomach.”
When your wife or girlfriend is stressed or sad what do you get her? Chocolate (if she hasn’t already gotten it herself).
Really, there’s no question that food is its own special form of love.
3) Humor
When you find people who share your same weird, quirky, off-color, possibly twisted sense of humor you have struck friendship gold. They’re the ones you can always trust will send you ridiculous youtube videos or those perfectly ill-timed texts to crack you up. How can you tell your friendship is at the apex? When they make you laugh during funerals, weddings, or church services.
4) Silence
Sometimes the best thing you can do for someone is give them space. Let them go their own way. Let them figure it out. Just shut up and get out of their way. Or maybe quietly sit near by. But either way, do it in silence.
What others would you add?
